But whatever promise lies in those ideas is lost in the game’s fundamental flaws. Remote Life isn’t short on ambition, but without the precision, reliable hit detection, and sense of control that are so integral to a shoot-’em-up, actually playing it is a bigger nightmare than any of those extraterrestrial monsters.

There’s a lot of promise in the more playful, “bikinis and water guns” breed of third-person shooter, but what’s here needs a lot more substance and refinement before it gets close to that potential. And when even the fanservice falls flat—cup sizes notwithstanding—there’s really not much else left.

Hundred Fires: The rising of red star is not a good game by any stretch: a Metal Gear Solid clone that is, at best, functional. It replicates superficial details with a wink, but it’s far too clunky and lacking in substance to be enjoyable. And yet, I find myself morbidly curious to see where the bizarre story of a Cuban Solid Snake, a ghoulish JFK hologram, and a Kojima-lookalike weapons manufacturer ends up.

I wish there was more to it—a tube-shooter-style racing game is an interesting concept, but it’s one that needs some solid design to bring depth and variety into the mix. Without that, the racing in Gravity Chase ends up being hollow: flying along a tube where normal race dynamics—cornering, braking, race lines, trying not to crash!—don’t exist and there’s nothing of note in their place. A well-made tube racer could be a lot of fun, but “go fast in what may as well be a straight line, and try to hit the blue pads while fighting deliberately unwieldy controls” is a long way off from that.

The idea at the heart of Memories of East Coast—a solemn reflection on guilt and grief, told through the eyes of someone reconnecting with their tragic past—is a sound one, but it’s too underdeveloped and riddled with grammatical errors to come close to delivering on its potential. I admire the effort that goes into a solo project like this, but shelling out even for just a professional proofread, if not a full edit, would have gone a long way.

Upon reaching the end of this review, I’ve come away with a revelation. Yes, Far Cry 6 is the accumulated chemical detritus from years of similar lab experiments, layered and stratified, compounded with time and pressure. But it isn’t a catalyst. I am. I played Far Cry 6 to completion: I pressed buttons to shoot guns and progress the plot; I killed an inordinate number of animals to buy upgrades; I equipped new pairs of pants to make myself stealthier. And at the end of it all, I felt nothing. I was unchanged by the experience.

The idea of a unique blend of word puzzles and detective investigation is an intriguing one, but that’s not what you’ll find here. Crossword City Chronicles is a no-frills port of a free-to-play, microtransaction-laden mobile game that ditched everything enjoyable about Scrabble in favour of a mind-numbing grind. The microtransactions may be gone, but the tedium remains, and without any hint of the promised “use [of]your detective skills” and the most lacklustre cases imaginable, tedium is all there is.