Cuisine Royale

 Xbox One
Metascore
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No score yet - based on 1 Critic Review

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  1. Positive: 1 out of 1
  2. Mixed: 0 out of 1
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  1. TheXboxHub
    Jan 19, 2020
    80
    Cuisine Royale is a solid, enjoyable game with a wacky persona. It doesn’t do anything new or particularly different to stand out above its rivals on Xbox, but it’s still worth checking out nonetheless.

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  1. VitiatedGaming
    Jul 20, 2020
    0
    Battle Royale; a disgusting trend invented by The Culling, a game that wasn't even good in the first place and continually tread out andBattle Royale; a disgusting trend invented by The Culling, a game that wasn't even good in the first place and continually tread out and prolonged by such garbage as PUBG, cementing it's place in the brainstem of society like an inoperable tumor. Much like an inoperable cancer, sometimes it spreads to the point where fatality is a guarantee. This is a monolith, a shining beacon to show that society is too far gone and life is no longer living. This is Cuisine Royale.

    In typical BR fashion, you are dropped into a large map where you are forced to loot copy/paste buildings for copy/paste weapons and armor in order to outlive players in an ever-shrinking play area. So far, so PUBG. Particularly so, considering the massive amount of brown splotches that seem to make up a map. Cuisine Royale couldn't even muster up enough of a budget to drop you from a helicopter, plane, or blimp like literally every other BR game on the market, you and your squad just get randomly spawned into this map. Are you 500 million miles away from the play area, or are you right in the middle of 20 other people? It can be either or, and the lack of player choice removed from this game on the very onset automatically puts it lower than its piers.

    Also in typical BR fashion, the menus are a nightmare to navigate. Upon killing an enemy, all their loot drops haphazardly scattered around on the floor. The only way to collect what you want from the body is to go over it and hit start, then scroll all the way down looking at the items that interest you. While you're taking the minutes needed to check your shopping list, you can very easily be killed by an enemy that had all the time in the world to waltz right up and put an axe in your head. Even games as unrefined and poorly designed as PUBG knew to put all lootable corpse items in one box that you can open and peruse, in Cuisine you are more likely to be standing just too far away from certain items to have them appear in your "nearby items" menu, forcing you to readjust your position and try again, wasting even more time and making you an even larger target.

    How about the gameplay itself? The worst I've ever seen. Iron sights and scopes wobble like a seizure victim 4 hours into a pub crawl, movement as a whole doesn't feel much different. Stamina is pathetic, taking you a few feet before forcing you down to a crawl. Otherwise it's just BR, but somehow even more janky and broken than The Culling II managed to be...If it wasn't for the loot itself.

    Think about Battle Royale for a moment. Warzone, Blackout, PUBG, Fortnite, Warface, whatever your personal favorite is. What is the loot like? For the most part I'd say pretty standard. You have guns, explosives, and armor with various degrees of stamina, power, and usefulness. The people who get the better guns and armor first always win, because Battle Royale is a completely luck based type of game. Pretty simple, right? Well, what if there was a Battle Royale game so broken, that the holder of a single piece of loot would always be the winner? That is Cuisine Royale.

    The "Uber Deathpan of Reflection", the single most broken thing in gaming. Whoever holds it is able to deflect all incoming enemy fire, then score an instant kill with it as close range. In fact, almost all melee weapons are instant kills. I couldn't even count the number of times I'd be firing my Kar98k, UMP 45, or MG42 (yes, these are all in the same game, likely because the asset store was having a special) directly into an enemy, scoring multiple hits, only for them to kill me instantly with an axe, a pan, the starting knife, or any other melee weapon. It's absolutely broken, and coupled with "powerups" makes the game even more unbearable. The winner will ALWAYS be the person/team who finds the loot chest containing this weapon, as the chest also comes with the best armor in the game.

    There is also the added delight of powers you can use after getting enough kills, the most broken of which is Beast Mode. The user gets on all fours and runs at double speed, while also having the aforementioned instant kill melee attack. If nobody on any team has the Uber Pan, this will be the game decider. One team will without fail use this, bum rush the other one, and get the win.

    I've come this far without even mentioning glitches, which are abundant. Clipping through walls, cars flipping over, people getting onto rooftops they shouldn't be able to, controls inverting themselves, sound dropping out, etc etc etc. My previous "Worst Game on Xbox One" award was presented to another BR, Black Ops 4. With this new information coming to light, I can say without question that Cuisine Royale has claimed that trophy for itself. Wear it well, like a saucer on your head, you miserable pile of broken trash.

    -10/100    … Full Review »