James Berardinelli

Few authors have been as badly victimized by Hollywood as King; this is just another title to add to the list.

Sadly, as apt as comparisons to "Underworld" might seem, I, Frankenstein can't even clear that very low bar.

The caper in Carter & June is clumsy and straightforward, lacking sophistication and intelligence. Sadly, that’s an apt description of the film as a whole, which is difficult to sit through and leaves no lasting impression beyond the desire to warn people to stay away.

There’s a tiny problem, though: Clementine is neither erotic nor a thriller.

The follow-up proves not only to be creatively bankrupt but a disappointment on all levels and thereby tarnishes the perception of its predecessor.

"Magic Mike" was self-contained, made with no expectation of a second chapter - and they prove unable to surmount it. Too many elements that made the first film an enjoyable experience are missing.

Offensive because it offers little more than unleavened stupidity in the place of the family-friendly action and comedy it promises.

At its best, Dumb and Dumber is like an Ernest movie with a scatological bent.

Things might have been okay if this film had gone someplace, anyplace, but it stalls early, then coasts through an hour of minimally-amusing material before screeching to an amazingly improbable stop.

Horror fans will be disgusted by the lack of gore. Romance fans will be disgusted by the presence of gore. One is tempted to applaud the filmmakers for trying something this daring, but the result isn't good enough to warrant any acclaim, however lukewarm it might be.

In The Beekeeper, as has been the case with pretty much anything Statham has done in the past half-decade, the actor is on hand to collect a paycheck in exchange for bringing a recognizable name to the proceedings.

An inferior product. It is not well written, well acted, or well directed.

I found the most extreme material to be so tasteless that it voided all comedy.

This is a bad movie with a good sense of humor.

A colossal disappointment. Not because it's superficial and shallow –- those characteristics pretty much go with the territory –- but because it's boring.

Although there are a number of problems with the production, the most glaring is the screenplay. The flaws of the final act are so flagrant that nothing short of a rewrite would have solved them.

Akin to watching a bad sit-com that never ends.

If I see another send-up of Sharon Stone's character in Basic Instinct, I think I'll walk out of the theater. It wasn't funny the first time, and, by now, it's gotten downright annoying. Who cares if she uncrossed her legs without any panties on? Let's move onto something new. Belaboring that issue is like watching this movie: pointless.

The Electric State has an epic look but that’s increasingly common in any movie with sci-fi elements. But, aside from the special effects, it feels unfinished, with the actors groping to inhabit barely-there characters. What does it say when Mr. Peanut has more personality than either of the main characters?

Perhaps the strangest thing about 2012 is that the bad parts of the film are among the most enjoyable, because they're so over-the-top ridiculous that it's impossible not to break out laughing.

For those looking for something positive, this is the only movie I can recall that features music from both ABBA ("Does Your Mother Know") and Handel ("Zadok the Priest"). Let's hear it for musical diversity!

Ironically for something titled The Watchers, this production lacks the basic quality of watchability.

National Treasure's storyline isn't compelling or coherent enough to warrant the term "plot."

The problem with Bones and All isn’t that it’s disgusting or shocking or transgressive; it’s that it’s a tedious slog.

There’s nothing imaginary about how bad a misfire this movie is even for the Blumhouse base.

This is one of those nearly unwatchable movies that becomes an endurance contest for any thinking adult.

Seagal fans will find that their hero is still in his usual form (his form, like his expression, hasn't wavered since he debuted in Above the Law). The action scenes are adequately directed (by Felix Enriquez Alcala, a TV director making the crossover to feature films), and there's a genuinely tense truck-and-car chase that is worth about 90 seconds of moderate excitement. The rest of the film is all by-the-book stuff, but that's what's expected whenever the name "Steven Seagal" tops the marquee.

A turd of T-Rex proportions, Land of the Lost makes one remember last summer's "Speed Racer" fondly.